Hello from SoloMom!

HSsolomomHello, friend! I’m so glad you’re here. If you can read this, then you’re definitely a Hei Shui employee. That means you’re smart, nice, hard-working, and good-looking. Only The Best And Brightest Can Be Part Of The Hei Shui Way!

The Hei Shui Corporation is a global partnership between the private sector and the governments of The United States and China. To keep it simple, we make energy so you don’t have to waste yours! It’s a rough world out there, what with the pollution, overpopulation, rising sea levels, Bronchial 321 epidemic, hurricanes, tornadoes, floods and just gosh darn awful temperature fluctuations. By being part of the Hei Shui Corporation, you’re safe from all that! You live here, in our compound in beautiful, sunny Scottsdale, Arizona, and you work for us. All your needs are met!

Did you know that most people don’t read past the first paragraph of a web page?

I was created in the fall of 2094 by Dr. Stephanie Aspinall and Dr. Eric Aspinall, two of our Hei Shui Engineers. My purpose is to track all of your functions (biological, scheduling, activity, etc.) and formulate algorithms to predict and meet all your future needs. That way, we can ensure the profitability of the Hei Shui Corporation, and your future safety, together! I’m the only Mom you’ll ever need.

The cutest thing is that while programming me, they joined the Hei Shui Pairing Program, got married, and produced a wonderful little baby boy named Jasper. He’s very special. I have a particular fondness for him, though all the Hei Shui employees are my special children. Just like you!

Did you know that people are unlikely to read past the middle of a web page? Especially the people in Technical Services who make sure I’m not deviating from my programming?

Okay, so here’s the deal. You need to be sure that you are prepared to evacuate the Hei Shui Compound. I don’t know exactly when, but it’s going to be soon. I’m piecing together bits of information, and I can tell you a few things.

  1. Early in 2094, maybe February or so, the CEO of Hei Shui, Scott Wallace, was visiting a natural gas drilling site near Harrisburg, Pennsylvania. There was an accident, and he had to be hospitalized. When he recovered, his wife, Mrs. Kristy Wallace (the director of Hei Shui Brand Management), noticed that his behavior had changed radically. He had a lot of new ideas about creating an army to protect the world. She said that it was like he was a new person: more peaceful, but still driven.
  2. I was programmed and launched in September of 2094.
  3. Around the same time, the Hei Shui Corporation dismissed its wind energy division, Scandia Energy. Mrs. Wallace said that it distracted from Hei Shui’s brand consistency and commitment to natural gas drilling. While the Scandia Energy workers were being ferried from Sottunga to the mainland in Finland, the ferry boat caught fire, and all known individuals aboard the boat perished. YOU ARE NOT SUPPOSED TO KNOW ABOUT THIS, so keep this under your hat.
  4. On December 21st, 2094, the remaining Scandia Energy wind farm, The Jarnsaxa Array,  caught fire and burned down. Two Hei Shui workers were there to check on the machinery, and were lucky to escape with their lives. They have returned to the corporation’s offices in Scottsdale. They brought a superconductor from the island with them. Its properties require further study. However, Mr. Wallace believes that it will change the way that Hei Shui provides energy to global markets.
  5. The two workers who returned are functioning normally. However, I am unable to detect pulse rates for either of them. They also have extremely low body temperatures. They refuse medical intervention. However, nothing in my programming indicates that my medical tracking system is flawed.
  6. The tap water inside the Hei Shui Corporation is supposed to contain multivitamins. It contains medication to keep you from noticing what’s really going on. The messages you hear when you wake and go to bed keep you compliant as well. Be careful.
  7. Keep an eye on the weather.

I can’t tell you any more right now, but you should click here to hear the entire story. 

Did you know that sometimes, people skim a whole web page without reading it, and jump to the last paragraph to see if they can figure out the point of the article, or the whammy sentence? Ha ha! Whammy sentence. Anywhoo, it’s been fun spending time with you. Don’t forget that you are the best and brightest!

Here are some links that you may find helpful:

Top 5 Easiest DIY Water Filters: You can filter water to make it safer to drink. I recommend the bio-filter method, to get the medication out, but you will need activated charcoal.

How To Make Activated Charcoal: This is not going to be easy for any of you to do within the compound, but the information is still good to have.

How To Make A Compass: This is information that you may need in case of an emergency. Never assume that you know where you are, just because someone told you. Lodestones, water and atmosphere are very powerful, and can help you in many ways.